Heavy in Your Arms
by ToscaThorCat
Summary: Prompt given to my by SonicWinchester, to write a fic based on "Heavy in Your Arms" and AoT. After a battle, Jean helps Eren get back. (bad summary, I know... *facedesk*) No ships.


**A.N.: This was a prompt from SonicWinchester. I am somewhat caught up on the manga, so… I know some stuff, but this fic is a bit of a "what if?" so Eren only knows as much as those of us who have only seen the anime *cough*SonicWinchester*cough* Whew! Allergies are terrible! ;)**

Heavy in Your Arms

It was quite the battle today. We were on another mission beyond the wall, still trying to reclaim Shiganshina. After Annie, I have trouble trusting my comrades. How many others are shifters? Was it just Annie? Am I just a burden? Armin and Mikasa could have died in Stohess because of my reluctance to believe that Annie was the female titan. I am broken from my thoughts as a bolt of pain shoots through me. I've been ejected from my titan form after becoming exhausted. The titan body still burns me, and the exhaustion from controlling the titan is almost unbearable. I usually hide it; I can't worry Mikasa any more than she already does. She worries for me, and I can't let her worry more. If she knew how much this hurt…she would never let me transform again. But if I don't transform, then how will I kill all the titans? I can't come up with strategies like Armin, I am not a killing machine like Levi or Mikasa, I am not intelligent like Hanji, I don't have as good of instincts as Sasha, I don't have the natural skill of Jean, heck, even Connie is better than I am…Ryner is just brute strength, and Bertholt no different. What do I have to offer if not my titan form?

I try to sit up, and my body does nothing more raise a few inches before pain shoots through my body, and I fall back to the ground. I groan as I stare up at the canopy of trees. A snapping twig catches my attention.

"Eren!"

My head flops to the side as I attempt to see who called.

"Jean." I smile slightly. Steam is rising steadily from my body as the burns from the titan body slowly fade. "Hey."

"Why are you just lying there, you suicidal bastard? Aren't you always shouting 'kill all the titans'? There are still some on the right flank." Jean held his hand out.

"Can't move right now. Give me a minute." I grunt, attempting to sit up again.

"You never had trouble before." Jean replies suspiciously.

"Yeah, I don't want to worry Mikasa, so I just…" I awkwardly scramble up using a tree as a support. "Force myself to move, and I detach myself from my body, in a way. It is like the pain isn't mine anymore." I pant a bit, steel myself, and start walking in an almost normal way. I take a few steps, and falter, and as I start to fall, Jean catches me.

"Hey. It is alright to not be alright sometimes." He said. "Don't think this makes us friends, you are still a bastard."

"Don't tell Mikasa or Armin." I mumble, somewhat embarrassed that I'm being carried by Jean of all people, and somewhat reluctantly glad that I didn't have to walk back.

"So, you haven't told them that the transformation takes a lot more out of you?" Jean asks.  
"Yeah, I don't want them to worry. If they knew, they wouldn't let me transform." I reply.

"Does it hurt? When you are in the titan? I mean, you come out with burns on a regular basis, and if it is so hot outside the titan… it must be worse inside, right?" Jean asked.

I shudder, remembering my time inside the titan's stomach in Trost.  
"It feels like you are on fire." I whisper.

Jean falls silent after my answer.

"Hey, we are getting close to the rendezvous. Do you want me to carry you in or do you think you can walk the rest of the way?" Jean asks.

"I'll walk." I reply as I slide off his back.

"We will speak to no one of this." Jean responds.

"Agreed."  
And if he's aggressive after a battle, or happens to grab an extra canteen and not want to carry it after a battle… must be coincidence, right? He's still an aggressive jerk.

 **A.N.: I do not ship Eren and Jean, this is meant as a weird dysfunctional friendship. They are basically frenemies, who can work together, sometimes show kindness towards each other, but the rest of the time they are trying to outdo each other.**


End file.
